Monday, November 2, 2009

The Walmart Effect

What is it about Walmart that apparantly brings out the idiotic and inappropriate in people? I seriously think this is an actual phenomena that is taking place right under our noses and I'm interested to hear if you all are noticing this too. Here's my evidence.

1. There are always people shopping in their pajamas. I saw someone getting groceries on Saturday in Tweety Bird PJ pants, a Mickey Mouse t-shirt, and slippers. Yes, all on the same person. I'm all for being comfortable, but this is going a bit far, isn't it? I mean, at what point does "It's only Walmart" become "I don't need to actually get dressed to go out in public?" Don't even get me started on the people that put on so little clothing that they are barely dressed. Tube tops are NOT ok for shopping at Walmart and especially not in October!! I'm not even going to talk about the woman I saw once who had a serious issue with back sweat and poorly fitting stretchy pants. Yikes.

2. People in Walmart forget that other people can see/hear them. On a recent trip to Walmart, I was pushing my cart (and my children) down the baking aisle when a woman came storming down the aisle at me, screaming on her cellphone. Apparantly, whoever it was on the other end was a completely incompetent moron and she was letting them know this....loudly. And with curse words....lots of them. Hello!!! You're in WALMART!! My two year old was incredibly interested in the show she was putting on. Thank God he did not try to copy her behavior.

3. People in Walmart can be downright rude. I have three anecdotes to support this point.


  • The woman on the cellphone was also in my checkout line on that day and someone sprayed some body spray on while she was waiting in line. I was in the process of paying when someone slammed into my back, pushing me up against the card-swiper thingy. Yup, it was Miss Congeniality, storming through the line cursing up and down about the effing "bleeper" who sprayed that nasty "stuff" that was making her sick. Lovely.

  • My cousin Christine relayed a story about when she was shopping at Walmart one day with her three year old daughter, Emma. A complete stranger came up to her and said, "It's such a shame when you young people nowadays have children before you're even done with high school." Christine (who has WAY more moxie than me) replied, "Excuse me? I'm 26 and married!!" This woman looked surprised and said, "Oh, I thought you were 18." And that makes it ok to say such a thing? Wrong.

  • Finally, on my recent trip to Wallyworld on Halloween, I was again in the checkout line. (They like it when you actually pay for things so this is a good place to visit before you leave.) Isaiah is two years old and was reaching the limits of his patience for this particular trip. He likes to grab at the things hanging by the checkout and he managed to get his mitts on a stack of gift cards, which promptly went to the floor. I scolded him and gathered them up as quickly as I could. Cue Micah to start crying. Perfect. I continued to unload the cart and one of the items I put on the conveyer belt was something Isaiah would have preferred to hang on to, so he started to have a bit of a fit. It was at this moment (with both boys crying) that the woman behind me in line looked and me and very seriously said, "Boy, I feel so sorry for you." Really? Thanks.

So, there is my evidence. Is there indeed a "Walmart Effect" or perhaps it's just that a certain percentage of the women who go to Walmart are rude, sloppy psychos. And they all seem to get in the same checkout lane as me.

And come to think of it, tube tops are never ok. Ever.


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