Reality

It is very easy in the world of blogging to custom design an image of yourself and your life.  Heck, it's your blog....you can type whatever you want, share only the photos where the kids are clean and smiling, and choose to omit sharing the story of how you ended up scrubbing poop off the wall at 3:00 am.  I don't know about you, but I get jealous easily.  It's something I've struggled with for most of my life.  If I see someone who seems to have it all together - hair always gorgeous, flawless face with no makeup required, children who can read Tolstoy by the time they hit preschool, a spotless minivan and an even cleaner house, and a blog that shares all these accomplishments like it's no big deal - I get jealous.  I covet what they have or how they have skills or stuff I don't.

I need to knock that off.  As women, we are constantly struggling with that need to be "enough."  Are we good enough?  Smart enough?  Thin enough?  Pretty enough?  Worthy enough?  Talented enough?  Loved enough?  There is a longing in the hearts of each and every one of us to be valued, something that years desperately to be loved and valued.  Seriously, if you haven't read Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul, you really should.  Wonderful book.  But I digress.

I don't want to represent myself unrealistically.  In her post that inspired me to write this one, Stephanie Howell writes, "i think that presenting your life as a perfect, beautiful, flawless movie script...well, i think all that does is make other people feel bad about their lives."  (Yup, she's anti-capitalization and I left it that way because that's part of who she is.)

So, here we go.  Here is my reality.

1. There is always laundry piled up somewhere in my house.  Half the time it is sitting in mounds in our bedroom because we're too lazy to put it away.  These piles usually reside on top of the pillows that never make it on the bed because I rarely make the bed unless company is coming over.
2. Under my kitchen table, there is a pile of dried up Play-Doh crumbs.  I've been meaning to sweep them up for a day or so. 
3. There are some days when I just try to survive until naptime. 
4. I rarely make the bed.  (See #1)
5. If I don't plan on leaving the house, 90% of my day is spent without makeup, deodorant, shoes, or a bra.
6. I don't fold socks.  They just stay in a pile in the laundry basket.
7. Sometimes I use naptime to read a scrapbooking magazine or goof off on the Internet rather than do the numerous chores that are needing my attention. 
8. We're terrible neighbors.  I only know the names of two of my neighbors and I have never had a playdate with anyone in my neighborhood.  We've lived here more than 2 years. 
9. My house is overrun with ants.  It happens every summer. 
10. I love country music. 
11. We're still struggling to get ourselves on a budget.  In fact, the shoes I wear most often are a 1/2 size too big because I bought them when my I was preggo with Isaiah and my feet were fat.  I still wear them because I won't go out and my new shoes.
12. I desperately need to get my hair cut and my eyebrows waxed.
13. I love my sons like crazy, but I constantly struggle with the fear that I'm messing them up beyond repair.  We don't have the money to sign Isaiah up for swimming lessons, we've never made a craft out of Popsicle sticks, and we spend a good deal of time watching Pixar movies and Veggie Tales. 

Stephanie challenged her readers to write a post like this on their blogs because she found it very "fun and freeing."  Next I'm going to have to do a list of all the things that make me deliriously happy because that's my reality too.

What's yours?