Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Closing the Milk Factory

First of all, allow me throw myself a little party for nursing this baby for four and a half months.  Yay me!  That's easily the longest I have made it with any of my three kids, so I'm supremely proud of myself for that accomplishment.  That being said, it's time to wean. 

Ever since I started Weight Watchers at the beginning of the year and changed the way I eat, my supply has dropped significantly.  Now that I'm not eating myself silly, my breastmilk just isn't producing the way it used to.  Thomas will nurse for 15 minutes and pull himself off, but then scream 10 minutes later and suck down a 6 ounce bottle!  He clearly isn't getting the amount of milk he needs from me.  Could I try to pump for a while to build up a little freezer stock and still bottle feed?  Sure, I could.  But I don't want to.  I really don't want to devote that kind of time in a day to being hooked up like a cow.  He eats formula just fine and I'm really just fine with this transition.

Other benefits?  I finally get my boobs back!  I was so embarrassed when I was talking to a girlfriend the other day only to realize my left breast had been leaking all over my shirt for the last 5 minutes.  Quite the fashion statement I was making that day as I walked through the grocery store. 

Of course, once I'm done nursing, I lose 7 points off my daily allotment of food from Weight Watchers.  On the other hand, perhaps that means I will drop the weight that much faster.  I know a lot of people say that nursing actually helps you lose weight, but my experience has been the opposite.  Nursing actually prevents me from losing weight.  I remember the pounds coming off much easier with Micah once we switched to formula. 

Plus, Thomas is getting ready to start solid foods, so I'm pretty comfortable with this whole thing.

Well, regardless of what happens from here on out, I am really at peace with this decision.  Thomas is happy, I'm happy, everyone is peachy keen with it.  Breastfeeding has never been something I have really enjoying and relished like so many mothers do.  I wish it was.  My reality is that I just tolerate it as long as possible for the sake of the baby and then I stop when I've had enough.  My view is that any breastfeeding is better than none, so by giving Thomas this long has been doing my best for him.  He isn't going to suddenly develop webbed feet or a third eye just because I decide to stop nursing.  He'll be just fine.  And so will I.

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