Friday, August 30, 2013

Hey Summer, you've been great. Now go away.

Oh Summer.  We spend month after month scraping an inch of ice off our windshield and cursing under our breaths, longing for your long days, warm breezes, and lack of snow.  Sure, we dread the road construction, but it's a sacrifice we here in Wisconsin are willing to make for a reprieve from the oppressively frigid temperatures, slippery roads, and otherwise depressing doldrums of winter.

That being said, I'm going to need you to go ahead and bugger off.

Here's the thing, Summer.  I need a little break from my kids.  I know, I know....that sounds terrible.  But it's totally true.  I don't know if you've noticed them, but my oldest is the one who has been tearing up and down our street with no shirt and a winter hat, riding his bike with no hands, playing Bey Blades in the middle of the sidewalk, and climbing trees until he is up so high he gets stuck.  He's also the same kid who has to sprint home to go poop, gets distracted by what's on TV and suddenly gets in a wrestling match with his brother over whether or not the plastic spoon should be a "shared toy" or not.  Before I know it, I am holding a Kleenex to the baby's bloody lip because the middle brother took a swing at Big Bro over the audacity of him trying to steal the spoon, but missed and ended up sending the baby flailing into the corner of the coffee table at warp speed.  Now I've got a bleeding baby, a fifty pound three year old with an anger problem screaming while in Time Out, and a five year old who is whining about why he can't bring the coveted plastic spoon to the potty with him while he goes poop. 

It's just that they're know....HERE.  Like, all three of them.  At the same time.  On top of one another, wanting the same Buzz Lightyear toy with one leg that they still don't know I threw away two months ago, whining over the fact that we aren't going to the zoo today because we just went to the zoo yesterday, crying over my cruelty that I'm making them go play outside instead of playing video games AGAIN, and always.....always demanding to be fed.  At least three times a day.  It's a lot to handle, Summer.

Homeschooling mamas are my new hero.  They deserve a magic card at Starbucks that gets them free coffee whenever they want.

I love my kids, Summer.  Really, I do.  It's because I love my kids that I'm pleading with you to hurry up and get out of here.  I love my kids so much that I am admitting that we need a little time apart before I start to not love my kids.

My oldest starts Kindergarten on Tuesday and I think I might be more excited than he is.
My middle son starts preschool on Tuesday which means he will be at school for four whole hours twice a week.

Do you want to know the best part about my oldest two sons starting school? 

That means their friends are starting school too!!!  Most days I feel like the warden at a mental institution as these rabid boys run through my house leaving a path of toys, dirt, and destruction in their wake only to go outside and play in traffic despite my hollering "GET OUTTA THE ROAD!!!" every 4.2 seconds.

With big brothers (and their friends) away getting some book learnin', I get EIGHT glorious hours of one on one time with my baby boy.  Although I did just write a whole post about how he does exhibit some early serial killer tendencies, he doesn't talk or break things as much as his brothers so he scores relatively low on the Maintenance-o-Meter for the time being.  Hey, at least he's too young to have assembled his entourage yet.  Before I know it I am going to have three teenage boys plus all their jungle beast teenage boy friends to feed and then you and I are really going to have some words, Summer.

We've had some good times this year, Summer.  Honestly, it's been a hoot.  Now go away.  Tell your buddy Fall I am ready for him. 

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