Ugh, you guys! I am over here lamenting because Micah's Star of the Week Poster is due on Monday. It's this huge poster that goes into all kinds of detail about his favorite movie, favorite food, favorite book and the like. He gets to hold it up in front of the class and talk all about himself and what makes him so special.
So, his fancy poster is due Monday and we're not done with it yet. There is still coloring to be completed, photos to be printed and glued in place, and apple juice to be purchased. Oh yeah, the Star of the Week is responsible for bringing in three jugs of apple juice for the class. See how they get ya?
Micah's teachers gave us this poster at the beginning of the school year, way back in September when the sun was shining and I was naïve and optimistic about the level of parental excellence I was going to achieve. Now that the temperatures have cooled and my expectations have come down to earth, I'm panicking because I still don't have that poster done.
Micah did fill it in once. I got home from work one day and our babysitter said they had worked on it together and it was all done! Sweet, I thought. One less thing for me to do. Did you happen to buy apple juice?
Unfortunately, Micah's idea of "done" meant that the entire poster was covered in a series of red scribbles and he had answered that his favorite movie was "Chicken Little" and his favorite food was something ridiculous like Popsicles. Maybe it was cantaloupe. Either way, the thing was teeming with straight-up lies.
I had to crawl back to Micah's teacher and ask for a new poster, lying though my teeth while I explained that we needed her to find him a new poster because his little brother clearly must have gotten a hold of it because there is no way that a 5 year old under direct, loving supervision would destroy their poster like that. It looked like something that you'd find in the childhood scrapbook of a serial killer.
Micah's teacher ever-so-sweetly reminded me that I could bring in his completed poster as soon as it was done and they would hang on to it until April when it was his turn to be Star of the Week, ensuring that no harm would come to his masterpiece.
That was in November.
Now here we are, mere days away from his big day and the stupid poster isn't done.
I'd like to say I have some sort of fantastic excuse, but I don't. For someone who carries a day planner around with her like a fourth child, you'd think that I would have a good handle on all these little details that need doing around here. If you could be a fly on the wall, you would often see me forgetting permission slips, realizing I didn't pack a lunch and shooing a kid out to the bus while attempting to convince him that the school lunch today will be delicious, signing off on reading assignments I'm not sure were actually completed, digging through piles of papers for that ONE that listed the date that one of these kids (God only knows which one) will need to bring a sack lunch in an actual sack of some sort and be sure to wear sneakers because we're going on a field trip and by the way, can you chaperone?
No way, Jose. Mama don't chaperone.
They'll be lucky if I remember to buy the juice.
Now where did I put that darn poster?